As we move beyond the holidays, I find that it might be helpful to give a review of some of the strategies that have helped my clients manage themselves when they felt challenged, and ways to prevent some of the difficulties.
- Become aware of signs of activation or being triggered: anger, fear, sweaty palms. This awareness is often all that is needed to begin to relax.
- Become aware of signs of dissociation: dreamy state, feeling far away, glazed, absent minded. Awareness and acceptance of dissociation are often the most important actions to relieve dissociation.
- If and when you see or feel such signs, know that this awareness is the most important first step. Take a breath and acknowledge your success.
- Pause. Stop what you are doing, if possible.
- Orient: trauma lingo for getting to the place and time that you are in right now: look around, let your eyes follow what they want to. Invite your innermost senses to be here now.
- Touch something: Slide the fabric of your clothes between your fingers or “fidget” with something like a bottle cap, a marble, or your keys – whatever is handy.
- If the situation you are in is causing the difficulty you are having and it is possible, leave the situation.
- Connect to people, places, things, or activities that feel good to you. Friends, lover, nature, music.
- Gently tap your skin with your hands: legs, arms, torso, head.
- Take a cool or cold shower. Feel your skin. Alternate with warm water.